Monday, October 09, 2006

Happy Big Stinking Fraud Day!

Christopher Columbus is seriously ruining my day. For one thing, Mr. Litelysalted and I are waiting for some important info from the bank so we can resume the construction of our new home, but we will have to wait a whole 'nother day because it's stupid Columbus Day and the banks are closed. In addition, after a movie-watching dry spell, I finally just put two Netflix envelopes out in the box this morning, but oh wait– they won't be picked up. Because it's stupid motherfucking Columbus Day.

Why does Christopher Columbus need his own Litelysalted-Plan-Ruining day? Because he "discovered" America? It seems like historians and politicians have a much more liberal definition of "discover" than I do. The way I see it, if you discover a continent which is currently inhabited by hundreds of thousands of Indians and Mexicans... You didn't so much "discover" it as you "found" it. Punk ass false-credit-taking Christopher Columbus. Oh, and after he found America, then what happened? We all came over here in droves and eventually killed off the native people. It's kind of embarrassing on our part, to say the least... So I wouldn't brag about it, much less give the schmuck who started it his very own national holiday.

Speaking of Indians... One of the forementioned Netflix movies I watched this weekend was One Flew Out of the Cuckoo's Nest. It was actually my first time seeing it; and holy crap! I can't believe they gave him a lobotomy!!!


aejr said...

yeah i saw cuckoo for the first time a few years ago... i had the same reaction, holy crap, except it was more for the fact that i found jack nicholson really attractive... before, not after the lobotomy, of course. i guess back in the sixties they did all that shit. read the bell jar if you haven't already. sylvia plath suffered a series of "botched" electroshock therapies... sometimes it makes me wonder how much we know about what cures us, even today. definitely not celebrating the finding of cuba, or the dominican republic, or whatever, and the rape and murder of an entire nation of people, vastly more intelligent and spiritual than the stupid white man.

Meechity said...

Of course I picked Monday to go to the post office to buy stamps and mail emergency credit card charge dispute paperwork. Or should I say the CLOSED office.

I apologize to the sweet-looking old man at the front door, in front of whom I muttered "FUCK COLUMBUS DAY".

But seriously: FUCK COLUMBUS DAY. What a worthless, meaningless "holiday".

Chris said...

Columbus was a tyrannical creep. Plus, one of the worst Sopranos episodes ever revolved around Columbus Day, so after several centuries that was just the icing on the cake.