Wednesday, December 27, 2006
Who wants to assemble IKEA furniture for me today?
When I arrived to work this morning I noticed that "Office Santa" (aka "My Boss") had left a new printer/scanner cabinet from IKEA in my office over the holiday. I've so far gotten as far as unpacking the (nine) larger pieces of wood and then I had to stop for a coffee break. When the coffee finally activates my brain and I leave this zombie-like state I'm currently inhabiting, I may start panicking over the vagueness of the following instructions:
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4 comments:
Those drawings seem pretty cut and dry to me:
Step 1: Talk to someone nearby about screwdrivers. Prepare for long, awkward pause or two in the conversation.
2: DON'T kneel over a broken drawer w/ your arms behind your back, pouting.
3: DO pat your drawer w/ loving reassurance while scratching your ass.
4. Instead of trying to configure the furniture pieces, find a Swedish-to-English translation pamphlet.
5. Use pamphlet to call IKEA headquarters and rip them a new one concerning their weird assholish instructions that are packed w/ more oblique symbolism than a Bergman film.
(re: #4: oops. I meant English-to-Swedish).
That was fantastic. I would totally be laughing right now if I wasn't already crying.
Draw dicks and boobs on the characters and send it back.
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