Thanks for Watermarking My Face, Asshole!

So here's an interesting thing. Apparently now at sporting events they have photographers come around and take your picture, which you can later view on their website and have printed on a variety of tacky crap for an exorbitant fee. As you see, the images are carefully watermarked, (so don't even think of stealing it for your myspace page-- thief!) and embedded so you can't even yank them off the page. As if I don't know how to use a simple screen grab.

Mr. Salted organizes these group baseball events once a year for his work buddies, and makes sure to always plan them on "dollar dog night." The hot dogs themselves are wrapped in foil, kind of burnt and squished, and on occasion shot out of a cannon by that lovable big green nutsack, the Phillie Phanatic. But they're a dollar, people! And that? Is all you need to know.

Q: How many hot dogs can 110lb girl eat in one sitting?
A: That, my friends, is my dirty little secret.

Last night was a bit different than previous years events, because it just so happened that "dollar dog night" fell upon "college night." And you know that can mean only one thing: hot dogs on the field! I learned something else; if you think the average sports fan acts like an asshole at sporting events? (Or is that just a Philly thing?) Try attending one filled with college kid sports fans.

To give you some insight, last night there were a record breaking 11,000 walk-up tickets sold. A particularly meatheaded attendee actually berated the "lemon ice" guy (in a tone of voice which normally precedes fisticuffs) after he told him that there was no "walk up" beer service on account that it was college night; blissfully unaware that he himself had just completely justified the "no walk up beer service on college night" rule.

We made what was probably a sound decision to cut out an inning early. Although we missed the thrilling end of the game, we also missed the drunken post-game rioting which undoubtedly took place. I imagine it looked something like a giant arena-sized Slip 'N Slide made of beer and hog dog mush. Baseball rules.