Thursday, September 21, 2006

Ashlee Simpson is disgusting.


Clearly, I'm not an Ashlee Simpson fan. She's an untalented attention whore and poser. Her horrible music and horrible singing makes me want to set myself on fire. But in spite of everything, I did at least think she used to be cute, in a Fraggle Rock sort of way.

This is just scary though. And sad. Inexplicably, she was already very popular. In the logic of "it ain't broke why fix it," what would posses a chart topping "pop singer" to go to plastic surgery lengths to make herself resemble an aging Playmate? I mean, there were so many things wrong with Ashlee Simpson, such as her creepy family, botched "live" performances, bad PR, the very fact that she can't sing. But her appearance was the least of her worries. If she wanted a makeover, she should have just dumped her family and music career and gone into acting or something. Now she's just a worthless whore with a big plastic face.

Update!!! Uncanny! At this rate Ashlee has about 10-15 good years left before her nose literally falls off her face! It's practically science.

9 comments:

no said...

Maybe her well-adjusted attempt at looking exactly like every other no talent famewhore in Hollywood (including her 'dumb as a box of hair' sister) has something to do with accounts that her father likes to publicly talk about his daughter's breasts. Apparently dear ol' dimwitted Dad even shoots provocative pictures of their breasts and then sell the pics to tabloids.* Because what says you care like pimping out your own children for extra cash?


*I got these facts on reputable gossip blogs so it's not like I'm just blurting things out irresponsibly. (I believe most things I read and especially things I read and want to believe.)

Chris said...

Ashlee's daddy probably hung ornaments on her nose at Christmas while leering at Jessica. It's bound to screw anyone up.

Anonymous said...

That was plastic surgery??? I was thinking that she was still recovering from getting her ass kicked in that boxing video.

Anonymous said...

There is nothing I love more than to see celebrities get more fucking ugly.
With any luck she'll get twisted into some kind of "oops my home sex video has been stolen" and she'll get work/press somewhere.

on an art note:

Warhol
http://www.brandywinemuseum.org/calendar.html

mk

Anonymous said...

Check out this website:

www.thesuperficial.com

They love to crap on celebrities and it always gives me a chuckle in the morning.

Boogie On Reggae Woman said...

OMG----------the pic of jackson and simpson is so crazy!!! ha ha ha

Boogie On Reggae Woman said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

I have never seen D.H. and don't plan on it. I do LOVE Fraggle Rock though, one of the greatest shows know to man.

Simpson is kinda cute, but I want to hold a match up to her face and see if it drips like candle wax. That would be a great Halloween costume!

couscouscaboose said...

"Now she's just a worthless whore with a big plastic face."

Hahahaha!