Monday, October 16, 2006

Why is flavored Pepsi gross?

Don't get me wrong. Everytime I see a new novelty Pepsi product, (or Coke, but I lean more towards Pepsi) I get totally psyched and think automatically, that it is going to rule! After all, I love mixing diet sodas and light juices together to make my own fruity low-cal beverage concoctions. The best is mixing the Diet Coke and Light Lemonade at Wawa to make a little thing I like to call "Lemony Soda." (Trademark, bitches!)

But I must have had a really bad experience with rum and coke somewhere in my adolescence, because whenever I taste any kind of Pepsi Vanilla, Twist, Lime, etc. product, I always think it just tastes like booze. The only flavored Pepsi I've tried that's not totally rank is Wild Cherry. Diet Pepsi Vanilla tastes like Malibu & Coke... Diet Pepsi Twist; Bacardi & Coke, etc.

The newest flavored Pepsi product: Diet Pepsi Jazz (Strawberries & Cream), is no exception. It sounds appealing... Well, to me, anyway, since I like weird fruity, candy-flavored drinks. On first sip it's not half bad, but the longer you drink it, the more it just tastes like some foul, nasty mixed drink that you would make in high school when your friend's parents are out of town and you raid the liquor cabinet. OH! And what's up with that name? Pepsi Jazz? Nice work, marketing department! I ran out and purchased this product, toot sweet so in the event that I liked it, I could stock up; since I give the stuff an expected shelf life of, oh, two weeks from now.


Chris said...

I think the name Pepsi Jazz is appropriate as it will almost certainly be ignored by the general public, just like regular jazz.

Meechity said...

... but unlike Pepsi Jazz, real jazz has at least SOME good taste.

Arguably this is the worst combination of flavors in beverage history. I was recently trying to explain this unpleasant clash to a friend. It sounds yummy in theory: Pepsi is good, strawberries are good. But in my mouth, the sacchariney-sweetness acts as a poor mediator between Overly-fake-candy-strawberry and Craptastic-cola, who are clawing each other to death over who gets to destroy my tastebuds forever.

Not QUITE as bad as 7-up plus. Wait... I don't know... I can't decide. They both taste like vomit.

Try Coca Cola BLAK, if you haven't already. It's like going to hell.

litelysalted said...

Your comments make me laugh and laugh and laugh. 7-Up Plus!!! I thought I had safely repressed that awful memory. I'd like to think there's a special place in hell for the person who invented it.

Coca Cola BLAK... Was that was coffee flavored?

Meechity said...

Yes, coffee and cola. Diet cola. Diet coffee. Hideous heat-wrap label covering a perfectly gorgeous glass bottle. Messy logo and typography. Pixellated background graphic (purposely?) "Carbonated Fusion Beverage" (what the hell does that mean??)

The remains of it sit on my cubicle as a representation of bad beverage and poor packaging. I swear that Coca Cola is taking advantage of that old middle-school "Oh my god this tastes terrible - TASTE this!" phenomenon that plagued lunchrooms everywhere.

Therefore I say: you have to taste this. You HAVE to!!