Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Sixty-five Bucks

Well, it finally happened: I locked my damn keys in the car. I lost my original set of car keys about four or five years ago in some kind of black hole which appeared in my house just long enough to eat them as I was running late for a doctors appointment. To this day, they've never been heard from again. So I've been using my spare key/keyless entry fob, and every year or so, I think to myself, "I should really make a copy." And of course, I never do because I'm lazy.

Last night I was again running late for an appointment -- this time with my hair stylist -- and I jumped out of my car at the salon, grabbed my purse, grabbed my cellphone, smacked the lock button on the door and slammed it, only to realize at the exact moment the door was slamming that my keys were still danging in the ignition. Fuck!

I don't know what was ultimately more degrading: having to shell out the biggest waste of $65 for the whole three minutes it took the locksmith to open my car door; or having to do so wearing hot pink capris and a button-down shirt with cherries on it, which is a cute outfit for a young looking 30-year-old to be wearing... Unless this 30-year-old had just had her hair cut and styled into a teased bouffant, (I don't know why she still insists on doing that, dammit) in which case, made me look like a young old lady-girl named "Flo."


TK said...

I locked my keys in my trunk once - I was able to get into the car, but the trunk release doesn't work unless the key is in the ignition. So I waited for two hours for AAA to come, only to have the AAA guy look at me like I was retarded and go," You do know your seats fold down, right?


Anyway, the bouffant? Totally bringing sexy back.

litelysalted said...

Ha! Why does that not surprise me?

Well, at least you didn't get charged for it, right?

Jeremy said...

I once locked the keys to my brother's car in said car while I was borrowing it. I freaked out and tried to with one of my friend's hair clips and some paper clips I had back in the restaurant. To make matters worse, some woman started screaming that I was stealing a car, which REALLY didn't help anything.

Anonymous said...

Oh puh-leeze! This is amateur hour!

Try locking yourself out of your house in the dead of night in New Orleans - hubby out of town - and some homeless guy circling around the block every five minutes, calling out,

"Now THAT'S a tasty piece of chicken right there. Umhmmmm... MEATY."

Locksmith took his sweet-ass time getting to me, and I lost 30 pounds shortly thereafter, so as not to be so irresistble to the ghetto set.

True story.

Ms. Mix & Bitch

celery said...

a former boyfriend and i were moving to chicago and landed close to downtown, around rush hour, in a large-ish moving van. we ducked into an apartment building to buzz the super and the ex locked the keys in the van - WITH THE ENGINE RUNNING - in the middle of the street.

aside from having the ass of my pants rip in public, locking my keys in the car while in the middle of nowhere hiking with dog is a frequent worry.

regarding the hair, did you, at any time, say "kiss my grits"?

litelysalted said...


Is there such a thing as amateur hour when it comes to locking yourself out? If so, clearly I have been bested. ;)